Fantastic meanings

Fantastic meanings...

CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!

MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor's degree and a woman gains her master's

CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present

CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees in the end

SMILE:
A curve that can set a lot of things straight!

YAWN:
The only opportunity some married men
ever get to open their mouths

EXPERIENCE:
The name men give to their mistakes

DIPLOMAT:
A person who tells you to go to hell
in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip

OPTIMIST:
A person who, while falling from the
EIFFEL TOWER,says midway:
"SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"

BOSS:
Someone who is early when you are late
and late when you are early

POLITICIAN:
One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence afterward

DOCTOR:
A person who kills your ills with pills and Later with his bills.